Filed under: awkward teen years/unfortunate adolescence, Ballers & Shot Callers, cool beans, deep thoughts, everybody does it., just saying..., LGBT, Music, relationships, Science | Tags: bullshit, Crazy, Dancing, Feelings, Fun, Idiots, penis, relationships, stuff .m. likes, teh gheyz
despite all the (not very) underground buzz, girls are creaming for Adam Lambert. i think American Idol is an embarrassment for America (pretty much par for Amurrikuh), but i’ve seen/heard/read enough about this Lambert guy’s sexuality (pictures on the internet of him kissing guys, pictures of him dressed in drag, and his ever-present guyliner) to glean that he might be gay. my question to that is: who the fuck cares?
what’s more interesting to me is why, despite all the gay buzz, there are still girls taking off their shirts and rushing the stage when he’s on it. girls still wanna do him (or at least make out with him), girls scream for him like he’s f’in Justin Timberlake. but he’s not.
i ask this question, not because it makes no sense to me, but because it makes perfect sense to me.
when i was really, really young (like 6 or 7) i loved the New Kids on the Block. back then my favorite member was Jordan Knight. then they faded away and i completely forgot about them for years. but when they made their comeback a couple years ago, i preferred Jonathan. without question.
the trend continued. for some reason, i remember a conversation i had with some girls when we were all freshmen in high school and we were talking about who our favorite member of NSYNC was (gimme a fuckin’ break, we were 15 years old.) i remember saying definitively, “Lance.”
see it? see the pattern? now, i have no “gaydar” of which to speak. i have no idea who’s gay or straight, no matter how obvious it seems. i don’t assume anything about anyone until they tell me. i have a friend i’ve known for 10 years and i have no idea if s/he’s gay or not (well, i have an inkling…)
but my point is that i am subconsciously, for some reason, drawn to gay boys. i don’t know what the deal is. i can’t at all speak to why.
i mean, like any other girl, i like being the affectionaltely-nomered “fag hag.” platonic friendships with guys of any orientation have never been an issue for me. (that’s not completely true… but mostly true.) but i want to make sure i stop short of the stereotypical “we go shopping together and he does my hair and we talk about feelings and boys and shoes and appletinis” relationship. nuh-uh. with my gay boys, we talk shit about people and to each other, we talk about workouts (not ab workouts, but real workouts), we talk about civil rights and politics and things that actually matter. sure, it helps to know that there’s no sexual tension there, but (embarrassingly for me) that’s not a huge problem in my relationships with straight boys, either.
i have yet another embarrassing revelation on this front: i have made out with a gay guy (i think.) we were at this DJ/dance party, and i was randomly dancing with him a group of other strangers (yes, and drinking) and i was into his friend. but he got me alone in a secluded area and we made out for a while. things happened that would lead me to conclude that he was straight, but then i drunkenly called him at about 3:30 a.m. that night because my ride had left without me and i thought i might hang with him til i could figure out my sitch (NOT to sleep over with him. assholes.) he didn’t answer, but this was what his voicemail said:
“hi! you have reached B to the R to the E to the N to the T! and i can’t get to my phone, but leave me a message and i’ll get back to you.”
so i have no idea what his deal is. but he was an okay kisser. but honestly, what’s the deal with girls loving ambiguously gay boys??
1 Comment so far
Leave a comment